Missing You (you know who you are)

SO, today your moving away. I know that Its hard for you to do, because you will be so far away from us. Especially him. I am very sadtoday, bcause you going away is one step closer to losing you. After everything we have been through and all the wrong you have done to me, I still love you. I miss you dearly. right now I'm four ours away from the place we once togather called home with our son, two dogs, and cat. It kills my insides to think that this is all thats truely left of a great friendship. I am honestly truely, hoping that on day you will realize what you have done to me, know that had we worked togather, we could ave provided a wonderful, loving, two-parent environment for our beautiful son.I'm not placing blame, I just think we both should ave tried harder. Do you understand how I am feeling right now? I Love you. I miss you. I hate you. I wish I never met you. You have relly gottn to the core of me. Now its time for me to fight to get myself back. I want you in my life, but not with the life that you lead. I'm trying to better myself, but in order to do that i need to do things that i know you have no interest in, but is ver important to me.
You know I wonder sometimes, if you miss me. If you miss me so much that you wish that you could take it all back to never do again, so we could be togather. But then I think to myself, surely not. Y would he miss me. He is living as though I was never even there. No one canput on an act that well. Can they? I hope that you read this and realize that this is made for you. I know i made the decision to leave, and a part of me regrets it, Because I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. It has been 1 month exactly to this day, that i left, and its killing me just as bad as the first day I left. I miss your arms wrapped around me tightly every nite. I miss waking up very morning and rolling over onto your chest and us both looking over into the crib and saying good morning to our son. Like I said, its been a mont and it hasnt gotten any better. When is it gonna get better? Why can't you just come around and relize the wrong tat you have done? why can't you realize that you are too self involved.
When is all of this going to happen? will it ever happen? or will I forever wish that things could have been different. Will I always continue to write all of my thoughts and feelings online, so that hopefully one day, you find this, and maybe then you realize what we could have built togather. I'm exhausted. I just want to be happy again. I miss you.